What is Facebook Messenger Kids?

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Designed specifically for kids “ages 9-11,” Facebook is attempting to create a social media platform that complies with COPPA (doesn’t violate privacy of kids), gives parents a wide set of controls, while likely grooming kids to love Facebook as adults.

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How Does Messenger Kids Work?

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If you use Facebook Messenger as an adult, then you’ll recognize Messenger Kids as a retooled version of what you’re already familiar with, complete with kid-friendly emoji’s, GIFS, stickers, filters, on-screen writing, video calling, and more. It works on all iOS devices (iPhone, iPad, iPod Touch) for now – an Android app has been promised soon.

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Here are the set-up screens, giving me parental control and explanations at every step. 

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What Do Parents Need to Know About Messenger Kids?

The parental controls are decent. We spend a lot of time in elementary school classrooms. At least half of the 5th graders we talk to have their own social media account! And, it’s usually Snapchat, Instagram, or TikTok, all of which are bad news for kids who are supposed to be at least 13 to use any of them. If a parent is going to allow a kid to use social media at a young age, then at least Messenger Kids is a safer option with many of the “fun” features of social media, without the risks.

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We couldn’t find any backdoors to a Google search (which is unusual). What’s more, we tried sending a YouTube link to a dummy kid account we created in the app, and we couldn’t open it unless we had the YouTube app also loaded onto the phone (the link transported us from Messenger Kids to the YouTube app). So, if parents are concerned about their kids opening links from friends, then make sure to have “limit adult content” enabled in Restrictions so you can review search history.

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Kids can’t delete message history! Awesome! Engaged, nosey parents (the kind we really like), can see what’s being said.

Are there privacy concerns with Messenger Kids? with Facebook, privacy always seems to be at risk. And we do have concerns about the app.

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How to Make Messenger Kids Safer:

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Regardless of the app, three actions mitigate the risks we’ve shared. We teach these actions in our parent presentations:

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1. Require approval for all app downloads.
2. Follow the 7-Day Rule
3. Enable in-app controls and settings

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We explain each of them briefly below. If you’ve already set up approvals for downloads and have used the app, please skip to the In-App Controls & Settings.

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Require Approval for App Downloads

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You can control app stores by requiring permission for apps to be downloaded. This is ensures your child doesn’t have access to an app without your knowledge. Here are the steps (for Apple and Android users):

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For Apple Devices:

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To require permission to download an app, you’ll need to set up Screen Time and Family Sharing (Apple’s Parental Controls). We explain this process step-by-step in our Complete iOS Guide (click here).  

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Once Screen Time and Family Sharing are established, here’s how to require permission to download apps on an Apple device:

1. Go to your Settings app.
2. Select your Family.
3. Select the person you want to apply this setting to.
4. Scroll down to “Ask to Buy” and enable.

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For Android Devices:

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You’ll have to use Family Link (Android’s parental controls) to ensure you retain control over what apps are downloaded. We explain this process step-by-step in our Android Guide (click here).

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Once Family Link is established, here’s how to require permission to download apps on an Android device:

1. Go to the Family Link App
2. Select the person you want to apply this setting to.
3. Select “Google Play Store”
4. Select “Purchases & download approval” and set it to “All Content.”

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Follow the 7-Day Rule

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This is our tried-and-true method of determining whether a specific app is safe for your specific child.

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Before you let your child use it, download the app and use it for 7 days.

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Create an account with your child’s age and gender and use it for 7 days. Play through a few levels, review the ads, see if anyone can chat with you, and poke around like a curious child.

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After a week, ask yourself, “Do I want my child to experience what I did?”  Even if you decide to allow them to download the app, now you have a basis for curious conversations about the app when you check in.

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Enable In-App Controls & Settings

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Follow the onscreen intrusctions during set up to enable any additional controls. Follow the steps above first, to see if the app is a good fit for your child.

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Bottom Line: Is Messenger Kids Safe?

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For parents who want a safer social media platform that provides a training ground for more adult apps like Instagram and Snapchat, then honestly, Messenger Kids is great.

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This stance will likely surprise many of our followers, but as an interim step between SMS texting and a full-blown, unmonitored social media experience, we think Messenger Kids is great. If you’re a parent who’s absolutely opposed to any early social media exposure, that’s completely fine and this app isn’t for you. But, for certain parents, it’s nice to now have options!

What if I have more questions? How can I stay up to date?

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Two actions you can take!

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1. Subscribe to our tech trends newsletter, the PYE Download. About every 3 weeks, we’ll share what’s new, what the PYE team is up to, and a message from Chris.
2. Ask your questions in our private parent community called The Table! It’s not another Facebook group. No ads, no algorithms, no asterisks. Just honest, critical conversations and deep learning! For parents who want to “go slow” together. Become a member today!

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